💔 When Love Turns into Control: My Story of Coercive Psychiatric Abuse

What happens when someone you love—and trust—uses the system not to protect you, but to silence you?

I never imagined that trying to leave my husband would lead to being locked away against my will. But that’s exactly what happened. Twice. He used the legal system—specifically a “302” involuntary psychiatric commitment—to trap me. And it worked.

The most horrifying part? He lied to do it. He fabricated stories. He twisted facts. He convinced others that I was unstable and a danger. And the system believed him.

Because he was calm.

Because he was calculated.

Because he wore the mask of control.

And I? I was scared. Emotional. Desperate to be heard.


🚩 What I’ve Learned

  1. When someone tracks everything you do, isolates you, and uses systems to control or discredit you—that’s not love. That’s coercive control.
  2. When they weaponize mental health laws to trap you, that’s not protection. That’s institutional abuse.
  3. When that person is on medication that affects their memory, and they admit they can’t remember conversations, but they’re still believed? That’s terrifying.
  4. And when the doctors knew—and even my therapist knew—but let it happen anyway… that’s betrayal on another level.

I wasn’t silent.

I was doing everything I was supposed to do—seeking help, showing up, telling the truth.

But my voice didn’t matter—not to the people who were supposed to protect me.

They knew about his memory loss. They knew I wasn’t a threat.

But no one stopped him.

No one questioned him.

They just let him 302 me—twice.

Because he played the system better than I could survive it.


🧠 The System Isn’t Always Safe

Therapists, doctors, emergency services—these are people we’re told to trust. But what happens when they fail us?

I trusted the professionals. I believed they would see the truth. But they didn’t. Or maybe they did—and looked away. That kind of silence is its own form of harm. It’s how the cycle continues.

Being disbelieved doesn’t mean you’re wrong.

Being labeled doesn’t mean you’re unstable.

Being abused—even by someone who seems “put together” on the outside—is still abuse.


💬 If You’re Reading This and It Feels Familiar

If you’re afraid. If you feel like no one believes you. If someone is using your mental health—or your reactions to trauma—against you:

You are not broken.

You are not crazy.

You are not alone.

There are people who believe you. There are people trained to help. You deserve safety, support, and freedom.


📞 Domestic Violence Resources

U.S.

  1. National Domestic Violence Hotline
  2. 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) | thehotline.org
  3. 24/7, free & confidential — live chat available
  4. National Coalition Against Domestic Violence
  5. ncadv.org
  6. Women’s Law (legal info for survivors)
  7. womenslaw.org

International

  1. UK: Refuge – 0808 2000 247 | nationaldahelpline.org.uk
  2. Canada: sheltersafe.ca
  3. Australia: 1800RESPECT – 1800 737 732 | 1800respect.org.au
  4. Global Directory: womensrefugeecommission.org/domestic-violence-resources


Telling this story is one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. But it’s also a way to take back my power.

If you’re going through something like this, please know:

You’re not alone. You’re not imagining it. And you deserve to be free.

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